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Posts Tagged ‘single ladies’

To pursue, or not to pursue?

Feb 25th, 11 / 13 Comments

Ladies, this one’s for you.
Gent’s, you’re welcome to leave your comments below!
This should be very interesting…

Pursuing the object of your desire is by far the worst mistake women make in dating.

Yes, women have come a long way.  We’ve taken over boardrooms, started our own businesses and completed MBA’s.  Why then should we wait for a man to ask us out on a date?  I have disagreed with many ladies who believe me to be old fashioned on this topic.

Their objections include this comment: ‘Women these days are confident, strong and take what they want.  Why should dating a man be any different?’

Well, the answer is, because you’re not a man!  Men are intrinsically born as hunters and need to be challenged.  Men not only want the chase, they need it.

A male needs to feel like a man, so let him be who he is supposed to be, by allowing him to pursue you.  He needs to feel worthy of his prize and the challenge of the chase makes a woman ever more attractive to him.  If he succeeds in winning her over he will adore, admire, love and respect her for as long as he possibly can.

A man who is interested in you will simply tell you this by pursuing you.  He will ask you out.  He will call you.  He will take you out on dates.  If he is not interested or doesn’t mind either way, then he will not initiate contact.

Why then would any woman in their right mind want to pursue someone or start a relationship with someone who wasn’t interested in her to begin with?

By chasing him, you are telling him that you are not worth the effort and he will start believing that.  Chances are he will lose interest pretty soon.

Other reasons why you should never take that first step:

  • You won’t know if he is into you or just comfortable with you.
  • You may be someone convenient he is spending time with until someone better strolls along his path.

Yes, males will tell you that they find it appealing and flattering when women approach them. It’s great for the ego!

Both men and women enjoy the attention this provides.

But…

Would they ever pursue a long term relationship with such a woman?
And if they would, are the foundations of respect laid?
Were they really that into her?
Did they want to marry her?

There are rare cases where a woman married a man she pursued.  She probably initiated every step along the way.
You need to ask yourself, how happy are they?
Does he feel trapped or does he adore her?
How long will this last?

This certainly doesn’t mean that you can just sit back, relax and wait for things to happen.

You need to give him clear signals so that he may know that his approach will be welcomed.

Offer eye contact, a soft smile and when he does approach you make him feel like a man.  Compliment something masculine like his strength, style, work, etc.

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